Driving in Dallas

Mamas, don’t let your children play so much on the computer.. Aodán and Xander have a new game they like to play when I am driving. One of them will announce, in an amazing sportscaster voice for a child who has never seen televised sports, that the Great Green Odyssey is in fourth place, and now being passed on the right by the Superpower Snowball, now on the left the Mean Green Machine is taking the lead, ooh watch out, from behind, here comes the Red Rocket. I think this comes in part from some racing game they play on the computer, but I worry about my ability to tune it out and drive safely. It’s very tempting to view Northwest Highway as a giant racetrack, to want to get ahead, even to dehumanize my competitors, I mean, fellow drivers,...

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Posted by Mara Collins on Jul 23, 2003 | 0 comments

Insidious Perfectionism

This reality business can be so darn hard! I hate that it has been two weeks since I have had a chance to write an entry, I hate that everything I have written isn’t witty and wise and filled with insight that makes you sigh “yes, it is good to be alive.” In fact, I hate that I am mostly patient and empathetic with my children but sometimes I’m just irritable and mean, I hate that my house is usually mostly clean but that there are spots under furniture that never seem to get clean, where dust foxes chase the dust bunnies, windows with fingerprints, and that, frankly, when you share a bathroom with four and six year old boys it’s just nice to keep a container of those disposable antibacterial wipes on the back of the toilet. I hate...

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Posted by Mara Collins on Jul 23, 2003 | 0 comments

Playing Catch-Up

What I remember reading in the last month or so Finally finished Mark Epstein’s Thoughts Without a Thinker, which for a relatively short book in relatively straightforward language just took me forever. Think I made reference to it in another blog entry. A quick read was Laurie King’s Keeping Watch — her website, by the way, has sort a nice little essay on why she writes mystery which helps me a little with some of the compulsion to avert my eyes when I’m admitting my taste in books. Keeping Watch has a Vietnam veteran as protagonist and somehow King’s description of his tour, while horrendous, was comprehensible to me in a way nothing else I’ve ever read about the conflict has been. Also quick and fun and in the murder...

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Posted by Mara Collins on Jul 23, 2003 | 0 comments

Re-Reading What I Write

My little secret: I cringe a lot. When you live with a six year old and four year old, particularly ones with the inquisitive natures and critical faculties that mine have, you get used to massively simplifying stuff (you try explaining how a tornado works while pushing a grocery cart, checking your list, and putting off a giant round of baby screaming with bizarre and dreadful contortions of your face). You also get used to having giant holes poked in your arguments, and every inconsistency in your thoughts, behavior and policies is placed before you with an accusatory magnifying glass… Unfortunately, among my hobgoblins, inconsistency is one of the most occasional. Still, when you write, it doesn’t do to sound all wishy-washy:...

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Posted by Mara Collins on Jul 8, 2003 | 0 comments

Some Photos

Too tired to write anything tonight, they’re worth a thousand words a piece, anyway, you know? the three of them… Rare moment! This child never sleeps… Doing artwork. Bonding Proto-standing Halfway from sitting to belly-flop ...

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Posted by Mara Collins on Jul 7, 2003 | 0 comments